4 YEARS OF NOFAP. BENEFITS, EXPERIENCE, THINGS I'VE LEARNED

In this post I’ll share with you my personal experience with what is called NOFAP. The reason why didn’t talk about it earlier is because I wanted to wait until I get to the 4 year mark. I wanted to provide you with the point of view of someone who’ve done it for remarkably longer period. Thankfully that happened on August 28th of 2017. My NOFAP journey started on August 28th of 2013 and it continues as I’m writing this.

Life before NOFAP

Before getting to the nitty gritty of the post I’ll let you guys know that I lived my big part of my life as a massive sex and porn addict. The period I’am speaking of included my late childhood, whole puberty and early 20’s. To be more exact between the age of 7 and 24. Yes, I started jerking of at the age of 7 and stopped at the age of 23. I lost my virginity right before I got 12. That makes total of 16 years of heavy sex and porn addiction. Why 16 and not 17? That’s because the period included some small gaps here and there.

Yes, I’ve done NOFAP few times before 2013. Followed by relapse, none of those periods lasted more than few weeks or a month maximum. I never had the willpower of maintaining it for longer. Eventually my addiction was getting the best of me and I was going back to jerking off and watching porn.

Back then I wasn’t aware people call it NOFAP, nor is that huge community and phenomenon. I also didn’t know that world is full of people who struggled or still struggle with the same problem. The written below is dedicated to them.

Want to know how heavy my addiction really was?
Good.

Honestly I was totally absorbed by the unbearable need of having sex and jerking off. Regardless of what I was doing or where I was, those 2 things were constantly preoccupying my mind. I had no brakes. I was doing it on all kinds of places, including home, the local park and even few times in school (in 5th and 4th grade). I had no access to cable TV, nor internet as 3rd and 2nd grader. Regardless of that I was already calling sex phones and looking at erotic magazines.

Is that enough for you? Probably it not?
Well, ok then. Keep reading …

With the risk of disgusting you, I’ll tell you that: it was so frequently that I was getting scars and wounds down there. I use to continue even beyond the point where I was no longer capable of getting aroused. Completely depleted of semen, I wasn’t ejaculating when having an orgasm. I was also barely feeling those orgasms.

No, even that wasn’t stopping me from doing it. It was all day everyday type of thing. The more I was binging on porn, the more I wanted to do it. A never ending cycle. Ultimately fapping was making me unable of getting proper erection when in bed with a real woman.

So since I’ve explained you the situation in which I was, let’s move to the list of benefits I received during my 4 years of NOFAP.

I became happier (much more)

I became calmer and more peaceful. My mood improved drastically. I started finding more joy and happiness in everything I do. The level of my satisfaction went to the roof when comparing it to before. My eyes got open for all of the little things and I started enjoying life a lot more. I developed deep sense of gratitude for all the things I’m fortunate to have. I also got very excited about some upcoming days and events.

Rather than focusing on the bad memories and adversities from the past, I began to count all of my daily blessings. Instead of seeing half empty, now my cup is half full. (at least 90% of the time)

I developed an unknown to me before optimistic mindset. Often I can get euphoric about all sorts of things. Including some simple ones such as cooking and rearranging my room or others like my crafts, family and the life in general. It’s like a natural high I get from the life itself.

I became more humble

I began to have a lot more patience about everything. Whatever is my music, my writing, my body the people around me and the life in general. I no longer operate with the mentality of a person who forces things to happen. I simply work on them until they happen. I do not generate negative emotions for something if it doesn’t happen today, tomorrow or until it’s set by me deadline. I accept the fact it requires some extra time and work and I continue on the path that leads to achieving it.

I am more aggressive, but I’m no longer angry like I use to be. Therefore I can channel that aggression in order do something useful and productive.

I became more tolerant to the others. That doesn’t mean I started allowing toxic people to participate in my life. If that possible, I tend to see something good in everything and everyone. I also no longer snap on people for no or insignificant reasons. I tend look more optimistically on every circumstance.

I have more time

Masturbating on its own was extremely time consuming. Doing it up to 5 or 6 times daily was drastically shortening the duration of my days. It was robbing me from my free time. On top of that there was something more. The fact that I was very choosey about the type of porn I was watching.

In fact I was only watching women and girls. Or women and girls in hentai version. If possible without toys, but definitely on high heels.

No men whatsoever!

I was also had something like a selection of actresses I preferred watching. All of the others I use to avoid.

No matter what, the videos had to meet my expectations. Otherwise I felt it wasn’t worthy to even touch myself. So, I was continuing with the search, until findinding what I wanted. Because of that I was often searching for new videos of the right kind for hours.

Besides that, I was never watching a single video. Instead I always had multiple tabs opened on my browser and I use watch only selected parts of each one.

Doing it multiple times a day, I was getting bored from those videos in less than week. So, I had to search for newer and newer. Once again from the same exact type. There was never enough time for me to get anything done.

Since I no longer have to do it, my days became almost twice longer. Now I can dedicate that time to my projects and goals.

I have more energy (probably 10 times more)

After only the first few weeks of NOFAP I noticed that my energy levels skyrocketed. I don’t know about you, but orgasms make me drowsy, sleepy, moody and very unproductive. All I want to do after having one is rest and chill.

Orgasms give me dry mouth and make me very unpleasant person to be around. I am tired AF and my brain is certainly not able to operate no even close to the way I want. Because of that I am not capable of getting anything done.

Since I started NOFAP, I often feel like I am on some heavy stimulants or nootropics.(Without the rush)
But this is probably because of my whole lifestyle, training, the foods I eat and the coffees I drink. However I do not believe they would have the same impact without NOFAP.

I learned that with proper diet, daily exercise and NOFAP/ No ejaculation you can go way beyond what you can do with shitty lifestyle and drug usage.

I became more inspired and creative

My nature of perfectionist raised. I began to strive for excellence or at least to be as good as I can in everything I do. I was blind, but I began noticing details and possibilities where I wasn’t before. My brain started making connections like never before. I got so many new ideas. Everything became so clear.
I believe that is what N.Hill describes as having a hunch.

I understood that ejaculation was robbing me from my ability to think creatively and out of the box.

I never released a track until making it sound the exact way I was hearing it in my head. Of course that required more time and energy. Luckily because of NOFAP I already had both and I was willing invest them in my art.

My motivation skyrocketed

I became way more driven and serious about all of my goals and aspirations. I no longer experience the urgency of having sexual expression. Now that urgency is somehow replaced by the desire of getting at least one step closer towards achieving my goals. The idea of creating music and different kinds of content took over my mind.

I understood that our lives are really not that long. The time we have to chase our dreams is actually limited. I no longer wait for the perfect circumstances, moments nor for the alignment of the planets. I jump out of the bed when it is still dark and start working towards turning another one of my dreams into reality.

Now all moments are great and every time is perfect for finishing project or starting a new one. I understood the quote: “There is no wrong time to hustle”. Very often I also make plans on how to improve my future.

Game over/ No more rat race

I no longer participate in the mindless rat race in which most men do. I am talking about the untold competition of being with more women than the next guy. Before NOFAP I was obsessed with the idea of my getting number bigger than the ones of my homies, but now that no longer belongs to my list of priorities.

I use to desperately believe that having bigger number was providing me with some strength and stamina to be better in life. Because it was making me feel like I was “the Man”, I thought the higher number was proof or verification for some kind of greatness. But I was wrong though.

Only after 6th months of NOFAP I understood, that being “the Man” was actually sucking enormous amounts of my time and energy. Adding the time I wasted on fapping, scared me to death. I opened my eyes for the truth that while I was “the Man” amongst a bunch of jokers, other people with similar grinds were working their asses off. I started seeing things in different perspective. I started thinking more about the future. I started asking me questions like:

Is constantly having more sex with different women was going to get me where I want to be in life?

I doubt about that, but after living with myself for 28 years I know one thing:
“No amount of sex will be able to make up for the way I’m going to feel if I go through my life missing the opportunities of chasing my dreams.”

So, the homies from the past won this battle . . .

My type changed

During my whole fapping period I was pretty much interested in one kind of ladies only. Formed by porn and rap videos, I had well defined but very poor criteria about my intimate partners. I was mostly looking for very extravagant and if possible close to porn star looking girls.

Those girls not only had to be around my age, but most importantly they had to have that so called “eye candy” or model kind of look. The closer they were the better. That pretty much was summing up all of my standards.

I also though that the outer look is more or less reflection woman’s personality and her experience in bed. I believed that the extravagant and even aggressive physical appearance is a sure sign for higher level of sexual experience.

I thought that the more extravagant a girl use too look, the better and more experienced in bed she was.

Somehow NoFap helped me understand and finally accept that the hottest and most extravagant looking girls and the great sex or company not necessarily nor always go hand to hand. Even thought the look still plays a key role to me, it is not the only thing and by any means can’t make up for things like:

·Person’s bad character and attitude.
·The fact that I feel bored when being around them.
·The fact I don’t have anything to discuss with them.
·Their lack of sexual experience.
·Most importantly if I don’t like myself when in their company.

My standards got higher. After only few months of NOFAP my eyes opened for larger number of females, I was barely noticing in the past. I understood that attractiveness is combination of many things. After that became self aware that I prefer to have older, more mature and experienced ladies for intimate partners. No, that doesn’t mean some crazy difference between ages. Nor that I no longer like females with age that is closer to mine. It’s simply what I prefer for the most part.

My perception of the opposite sex changed

While avoiding to talk to the others, I was mostly communicating with females I was finding attractive. When doing so, sex was always in my head. I couldn’t be able to control it. Actually I had zero interest of communicating with the opposite gender about things not related to sex.

No matter what the situation and circumstances were, the first coming to my head thoughts always were:

Do I find her sexually attractive? If so to what extend? Can I date her and eventually have sex with her? Or can I only do the second. And of course is it worthy to start working towards achieving it?

I was often seeing the people from the opposite sex mostly as potential or non potential intimate partners rather than human beings.

Those thoughts weren’t only preventing me from paying attention to the conversation, but they were entirely blurring my perception about the person in front of me.

Not once same blind desire for sexual expression prevented me from making new friends and even creating relationships with high quality females.
Not once it also made me have sex with the wrong partner. It also kept me staying for too long in a relationship with the wrong person.

During my teens that was also making me feel very awkward and uncomfortable. Probably due to the fact back than I was more shy than ever and I was lacking confidence. Both of them byproduct of low testosterone levels caused by fapping.

Luckily now I can talk or hang out with any female as long as we have same interests, goals or crafts. I can discuss all sort of things, be present and adequately participate in the conversation.

My willpower got stronger

I was never a quitter, but back in the day I was often losing interest a lot quicker. Now I can handle bigger workloads and project with no problem. I also feel way more determined to go after my dreams and do what I want to do.

I no longer tend to overthink things. I focus on the single steps I have to take in order to achieve something and take action.

I became way more productive

I swear that those 4 years were not only the best, but also the most productive since I’ve been born.I learned so many new things which made me so much better in all of my crafts. Below is a list of things I accomplished during those 4 years.

·I developed my own signature style in music (something I wanted to do since my early teens);
·I released two albums : Jack Of All Trades (Mixtape) and Magic Dice (first release on Itunes);
·I massively improved my English;
·I built my own website from scratch;
·I started making videos on Youtube;
·I started writing;
·I gained plenty of knowledge in the fields of music production, turntablism, nutrition, training, biohacking and personal development.
·I completely transformed my physique (and continue doing it);
·I got driving license;
·I finished university and finally got my bachelor degree (something I was putting away since years);
·I got certified by ISSA as a fitness trainer;
·I got certified by ISSA as a nutrition specialist;
·I learned how to film and edit my own music videos without any additional help;
·I learned how to make logos, artworks and visuals for me and my music;

I developed strong relationship with myself

I started to love and trust myself a lot more. I began to experience some deep and good emotions when thinking about me. The longer I wasn’t masturbating and watching porn, the more things I was able to do and achieve. So, the more progress I was making and the better opinion about myself was developing.

Ultimately I started feeling great in my own skin. Therefore I started valuing myself more. I found that I am capable of doing way more things, than I previously thought.

I started dedicating more time on things like decorating my room, designing custom tables for my equipment, searching for new filming gear and others. I also started buying me some nice things I always wanted to have like clothes sneakers and other designer accessories.

Due to that relationship I also became more confident and secure about myself and my life. I started feeling more self sufficient. I also became obsessed with doing everything on my own, without any additional help.

Better sex life

As I’ve mentioned quite often fapping was making me incapable of having intimate contacts with a real partner. If I really wanted to have quality sex I had to not touch myself at least 2 days prior to the act. Otherwise I’ve always had difficulties maintaining my erection even when in bed with a woman I was finding attractive.

I was getting decent boner, but I was not able to maintain it. And it was all gone when I had to put the rubber on. So, after doing it my erection was virtually gone.Yes, that was after she was giving me head and stuff.

After a while putting a condom began frightening the crap out of me. Because I though they were the reason for my short lasting erections, I was purposely buying only the thinest rubbers. However that didn’t help.

Even though rubbers may cause some decrease of the sensitivity, it is very small and incomparable to the one caused due to fapping. Having a steady intimate contacts helped me figure out that fapping was producing huge negative impact on my performance in bed. The less I was masturbating, the better and longer lasting erections I was able to maintain. The better quality of sex I had and the more satisfied my partners were. Way more actually.

Ultimately I quit fapping and entirely changed my performance in bed. I started having better endurance. I became capable of extending the duration of a single act as long as I want. Something that appears to be very important when I am with a more experienced and mature than me partner.

After doing NOFAP for long enough I never experienced the problem I just described. It simply disappeared.

It may sound funny, but I often feel like I can stay as hard as I want even if the rubber is thick as truck tyre. Or if I put multiple rubbers.

As addition to this, I no longer feel urgency to necessarily have my partners on high heels. Don’t get me wrong it’s still a fetish of mine. But I don’t have OCD about them and that isn’t what determines the quality of my performance in bed.

My physique got better

Besides the improvements of my performance in bed, something partly unexpected happened to my body. After first few weeks I noticed my physique instantly got better. I became fuller, leaner and way more vascular. (way more). No, I didn’t do any training nor dietary adjustments. My training and diet regimes stayed the same, but I guess my body started responding differently.

I started getting 10 times better pumps. For less than 2 weeks I added half of plate on all basic movements, such as deadlift, squat and bench press. I also began moving more weight on all of the exercises I was doing. Yes, back then I was interested in lifting heavier weights. Actually that was very important to me. However that wasn’t the coolest thing. After the first year I began training twice a day. But I believe that is another by product of my whole lifestyle.

My muscles started to not only contract, but also peak a lot better. After one month felt like my muscle bellies got fuller and more dense then ever. Almost like my genetics changed a bit. We all know this is not possible. And no, I don’t believe that is what happened. It is just how my body started to look and perform. I was finally able to see the progress I’ve actually made.

No matter of my diet and training, before my muscles were shrinked. Regardless of my efforts I was always smooth and flat.

Remember that I said partly? That’s because regardless of what heavy steroid users tend to believe, I always knew fapping was f*****g my gains up. Obviously it was decreasing the levels of my testosterone. The moment I quit, I experienced what is to have optimal levels. That immediately reflected to my physique and gym performance.

Different relationship with sex

My sex drive is higher than before, but now I am able to control it. I have the power to make wise decisions when it comes to picking up my partners. I’m able to think, clearly and decide if sharing intimacy with a certain person is worthy.

I also no longer have OCD about having sex right here and right now.

I no longer experience feelings of massive anxiety, triggered by the need of watching porn and masturbating or having sex. I feel I’m in total control of my body when it comes of having or not having sex.

If you read my blog or watch me on youtube, you know that I’m big proponent of the controlled or cyclical celibacy for channeling sexual energy and boosting productivity. Well, I can ensure you it wasn’t always like that. During my fapping period celibacy was barely coming to my head and I thought I would never be able to practice it.

Luckily things changed. . .

Alternating between periods dedicated to grind and work with ones to pleasure and intimate contacts became essential part of my life. I believe it’s the best thing you can do in order to get the best of both worlds.

I understood that all addictions are the same

Based on my experiences with other things I would say that the addiction to porn, sex and masturbation is really not that different nor special than any other one. Even though for some of us it may be stronger or seem to be more natural the way you’re getting off of it is the same, such as the way you get off other stuff. It really doesn’t matter if we talk about drugs, alcohol, cigarettes or junk food. Quitting an addiction or heavy abuse boils down to one thing and one thing only. That’s:

Not doing it.

Yep, that’s what I said. The less you do it, the less desire you have for it and vice versa. The more you do it, the more you want it. Therefore the more addicted you become.